Razzies 2016!

The answer to the Oscars, the Razzies are for bad films and performances. As usual, I find no fault with this year’s nominees or decisions. I went out of my way to avoid the two films that dominated the awards this year. I am both happy at this, and sad. My crap detector has caused me to see far fewer bad films than in the past. This is not a good thing. One cannot completely appreciate great art unless you are exposed to garbage as well.

Here are the nominees and winners of this year’s Golden Raspberry! “Winners” in Green

WORST PICTURE

A Tie! The stench from these 2 has become the stuff of legend, but my money, although I did not see it, would be on Fantastic Four. Maybe I will sneak it in one afternoon on Netflix. As a comic fan, I think it would only piss me off.

Fantastic Four
Fifty Shades of Grey
Jupiter Ascending
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2
Pixels

WORST ACTOR

I am smelling a trend.

Johnny Depp, Mortdecai
Jamie Dornan, Fifty Shades of Grey
Kevin James, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Adam Sandler, The Cobbler and Pixels
Channing Tatum, Jupiter Ascending

WORST ACTRESS

Oh yes. It’s happening A sweep of the top three by 50 shades.

Katherine Heigl, Home Sweet Hell
Dakota Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Mila Kunis, Jupiter Ascending
Jennifer Lopez, The Boy Next Door
Gwyneth Paltrow, Mortdecai

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR

I am torn here. Jupiter Ascending looked amazing, and Redmayne is a great actor. I must see this.

Chevy Chase, Hot Tub Time Machine 2 and Vacation
Josh Gad, Pixels and The Wedding Ringer
Kevin James, Pixels
Jason Lee, Alvin & The Chipmunks: Road Chip
Eddie Redmayne, Jupiter Ascending

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

No opinion on here either way. Did not see the films, nor do i watch her tv show. Alvin was doomed the minute I heard it was opening against Star Wars. The studio buried it there for a reason.

Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting, Alvin & The Chipmunks: Road Chip and The Wedding Ringer
Rooney Mara, Pan
Michelle Monaghan, Pixels
Julianne Moore, Seventh Son
Amanda Seyfried, Love the Coopers and Pan

WORST REMAKE/RIP-OFF/SEQUEL

Hot Tub Time Machine 2 was pretty bad. FF must be terrible

Alvin & The Chipmunks: Road Chip
Fantastic Four
Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

WORST SCREEN COMBO

Jeeze. How bad were these 2? All the had to do was have kinky sex. The other nominees are hilarious though.

All Four “Fantastics,” Fantastic Four
Johnny Depp and His Glued-On Moustache, Mortdecai
Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Kevin James and EITHER His Segue OR His Glued-On Moustache, Paul Blart Mall Cop
Adam Sandler and Any Pair of Shoes, The Cobbler

WORST DIRECTOR

A directorial melt down SO BAD that it cost him a Star Wars gig. Epic.

Andy Fickman, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Tom Six, Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence)
Sam Taylor-Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Josh Trank, Fantastic Four
Andy and Lana Wachowski, Jupiter Ascending

WORST SCREENPLAY

I can believe this.

Fantastic Four (screenplay by Simon Kinberg, Jeremy Slater and Josh Trank, Based on the Marvel comic book by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby)
Fifty Shades of Grey (screenplay by Kelly Marcel, Based on the Novel by E.L. James)
Jupiter Ascending (written by Andy and Lana Wachowski)
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 (screenplay by Kevin James & Nick Bakay)
Pixels (screenplay by Tim Herlihy and Timothy Dowling, Story by Herlihy, Based on a Work by Patrick Jean)